With an incredible talent to contort her body six ways to Sunday, Subsidies bassist and spiritual leader Laura Van is regarded by her family as the most attractive member of the band. This is evident, they say, in all the attention she garners at shows. Many a man will stumble stage-side, beer in tow, to stare at her with a look of drunken shame and amazement as she makes “figurative” love to her bass, which she named “Todd.”

Among other impressive accomplishments, she has climbed the 2nd tallest mountain in Iowa (Diggins Hill outside of Bode, Iowa). She has driven her Mazda 3 127 miles after the low fuel light came on. She has survived having an Italian-style mustache. She has lived off of chemical shakes for the last 8 months. She has invented a new letter for the American alphabet (landing between the letters “j” and “k,” in the shape of an upside down “y,” pronounced “Gi”). She has created a pornographic film using the characters from Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and Fraggle Rock. She has rocked your world – both figuratively and literally. She is everything you hoped you’d be.

The Subsidies
Collin | Dave | Grant | Joe | Laura